Wednesday, April 30, 2003
[Mood | Shaking]
I spoke at the service and surprisingly I didn't cry when I spoke. I did cry when one of his friends mentioned him writing that appeal letter to U of M. Just thinking of that day I spent with him writing that letter leaves me in pain. We did so much together in that short amount of time. He was special to everyone. I heard that he talks to everyone around like 2am. Hehe, it sounds just like him.
Well, seeing the body there in the casket just made me feel... well I don't know how to explain it. The body didn't even look like him, even though it did? I don't know, but it was so silent. At the hospital at least you could see him breathing and the rising and falling of his chest, but in the casket, so silent. I had a total reality check. There are so many things I need to do and I need to work hard.
Well Alex told us that when he was up there speaking, the whole room was glowing. That was comforting to know. He had so many friends and so many good memories. I'm just glad he was able to have a meaningful life before he died. He touched so many lives, and now whereever he is, he's touching more lives.
I've decided to become buddhist again and follow my family's normal practices. I mean if we've had the same temple in our family for years and if I want to be cremated and put in that temple, I guess I'll have to follow that. When I die (hopefully old) I want a young picture of me put on the stone urn. I don't know, but I guess it'd make me feel better.
Well, life is mysterious in many ways. I'll just have to keep my chin up and keep on smiling and laughing for Serge.
"Call me back later if you're bored"
~Joanna~
[Weather | Ok]
[Listening | Colorblind by The Counting Crows]
I spoke at the service and surprisingly I didn't cry when I spoke. I did cry when one of his friends mentioned him writing that appeal letter to U of M. Just thinking of that day I spent with him writing that letter leaves me in pain. We did so much together in that short amount of time. He was special to everyone. I heard that he talks to everyone around like 2am. Hehe, it sounds just like him.
Well, seeing the body there in the casket just made me feel... well I don't know how to explain it. The body didn't even look like him, even though it did? I don't know, but it was so silent. At the hospital at least you could see him breathing and the rising and falling of his chest, but in the casket, so silent. I had a total reality check. There are so many things I need to do and I need to work hard.
Well Alex told us that when he was up there speaking, the whole room was glowing. That was comforting to know. He had so many friends and so many good memories. I'm just glad he was able to have a meaningful life before he died. He touched so many lives, and now whereever he is, he's touching more lives.
I've decided to become buddhist again and follow my family's normal practices. I mean if we've had the same temple in our family for years and if I want to be cremated and put in that temple, I guess I'll have to follow that. When I die (hopefully old) I want a young picture of me put on the stone urn. I don't know, but I guess it'd make me feel better.
Well, life is mysterious in many ways. I'll just have to keep my chin up and keep on smiling and laughing for Serge.
"Call me back later if you're bored"
~Joanna~
[Weather | Ok]
[Listening | Colorblind by The Counting Crows]
Labels: high school, SBD
